Feeling Drained by a Relationship? Cut those Psychic Cords!

©July, 2008 by guest blogger Sonya Green of www.reinventingmyself.com

Throughout the ages, psychics and mystics have referred to psychic cords. You might imagine them as golden cords which connect people via the charka centres; kind of like a direct phone line connected to receiving stations within the physical body. Thoughts, feelings and images are sent and received via these cords. In a healthy relationship this can be seen as a system which bonds and supports. In an unhealthy relationship this bond can become a form of bondage – a controlling addiction.

If two lovers have established strong psychic cords then they will remain tuned into each other for some time (sometimes years) after they break up. One person may have had closure and moved on, but the other is left broken-hearted, abandoned and confused. The injured person may obsess or pine over the lost lover and it is that emotional energy that pulls on the other’s energy.

Here’s an example–let’s call them Bill and Jane. Bill fell out of love with Jane a few months before he broke up with her. In that time he prepared for the end and resolved his feelings – he had closure. He was anxious to get free from Jane and was feeling smothered by her and guilty about her. To him, the break up was like a breath of fresh air and he was excited about meeting other women and doing other things.

 Jane couldn’t believe it–she had so many expectations and needs; Bill had become her whole life. Jane couldn’t and wouldn’t let go; she dreamt about him, cried over him and obsessed about him to such a degree that almost all of her thoughts and  feelings were about him.

Bill began to feel very tired and became touchy for no explainable reason.  He found himself thinking about Jane quite a lot. He felt guilty even though he had no reason to feel this way.

She showed up in his thoughts and dreams and she would cling to him and beg him to come back. He felt angry and irritable a lot of the time, he had headaches and trouble getting to sleep at night. He couldn’t define it, but he somehow thought Jane had something to do with this. Sometimes he would think about her and feel repulsed. He had wanted to remain friends with Jane, but found that he felt retracted and tense when he tried to call her.

Jane was having a much worse time of it. She wondered if she would have a nervous breakdown. She could not stop thinking about Bill, she sensed him near her, imagined his voice, everything reminded her of him. She silently begged him to love her again. She hated him and wanted to hurt him, she imagined him becoming ill so he would need her.

Because Jane’s thoughts were so strongly charged by emotion, Bill was tuning into them, and feeling them within his own body. Because it didn’t make logical sense to him he dismissed his thoughts about Jane and just assumed that the thoughts and feelings were his own. Because Jane was trying to pull Bill back to her, she was actually draining him of energy.

Due to the intensity of her emotions, she was also bleeding out her own energy.  She became exhausted, depressed, unable to concentrate, accident prone, couldn’t eat and became very weak. The worse she felt, the more she needed Bill. Bill became her medicine; her lifeline, he was her obsession and addiction. Ironically, she believed that this desperation was profound love. 

People do this unconsciously and it is a lot more than just thinking about someone or missing them. This is a psychic attack,  and unless it is recognized and resolved it can destroy people. In effect, Jane had been living her life through Bill for some time. He had been unconsciously picking up on her demands or intrusion into his personal space and backed away.

She sensed him withdrawing and psychically lunged at him, trying to hold him down. She had managed to some degree to drain him and manipulate him. But in doing so, she depleted her own energy, destroyed her self-esteem, ruined her health and almost created a nervous breakdown.

Jane was putting so much of her energy into Bill that it became exaggerated and unrealistic. She was making Bill bigger and better and much more important than he really was. She was making him God-like and at the same time, shrinking herself down into less and less.

Psychic cords are most noticeable when a strong emotional attachment has been established. They might not be as intense with other people, but they can exist in any relationship. Any strong, emotional, repetitious thought will create cords. Often they are weak and temporary. Ongoing jealously, anger, criticism or pessimism can create cords with co-workers, neighbours or anyone for that matter.

Often we do sense that someone is pulling our energy. We might not say it out loud or even think it through, but we just know that it is happening and we sense who is doing it. We might even retaliate without knowing it—psychic pulling and pushing or even a little psychic warfare going on.

There are certain people who might drain you every time you see them. You can’t put your finger on it as they appear to be pleasant enough, but they just leave you feeling tired or irritated. Without realizing it, we put up barriers, avoid people, snap at them without reason or tense our muscles when they come near us. This usually goes on without a word being said, most of the time we don’t even realize we are doing it.

 Remember that psychic energy is usually created unconsciously. We can very easily pull on people because they appear to have something we think we need, or someone might only represent something that we want.

 We can even fixate on events or objects. An example of this is when you highly desire something and put a lot of emotional thought, feeling and imagination into it. This is another way of bleeding out your energy and draining yourself.

Sometimes a past  trauma can keep our energy feeding into it. We don’t need to retaliate, or push back or pull in, we just need to sever the cord and break the connection.

If you do believe that a particular person is draining you, it makes no sense to struggle with it. The person needs something from you that you do not wish to supply. Why the person believes that you are the source is anyone’s guess and not worth thinking about.

 Don’t get angry or resentful or offended. Just imagine that whatever it is that they want is abundantly and perfectly available to them through other avenues. Mentally ask them to go to where their true purpose is waiting; wish them well and imagine that they are being pulled into the light, to be healed and revitalized. Imagine pulling a golden cord from yourself and out from them, then cut it with scissors. Finish by surrounding yourself with a protective barrier of light.

 About the Author:  Sonya Green is an author and healer based in Australia.  This material is excerpted from a longer article on psychic chords from her book, Reinventing Myself. The book can be purchased in hardcopy or ebook form on her website, www.reinventingmyself.com. On that site, you’ll find more of her writings on metaphysical and healing topics.