©2011 by Guest Blogger, Mary English, DSH
Note: the following is an excerpt from Mary English’s new book, How to Bond with an Aquarius. Published by O Books and available on Amazon.com in Kindle and paperback, this perceptive analysis discusses keys to maintaining relationships with Aquarian lovers, fathers, mothers, siblings, children, bosses, and friends. This segment focuses on Aquarian women and what they are looking for in dating and friendship.
To bond with an Aquarius, you first have to understand their motivations. What makes them tick, the breath that keeps them alive. Each Aquarius will have a different life-view: The Ascendant, a different home: the house their Sun is in and a different way of dealing with emotions: the Moon, but underneath all of this is the unchanging gestalt that they are a member of the human race working towards being with other like-minded people.
Being Friends with an Aquarian Woman
Aquarians find it hard to live without friendship. It’s their motivating factor. An Aquarius friend will meet you and want to experience something with you depending on their Moon sign and other chart factors. They mostly can manage on their own.
Unlike other signs who need partners to feel complete or whole, as a general rule Aquarius can exist quite happily by themselves. However, to deprive an Aquarius of friendship would be the biggest form of torture of all. And humanitarian issues. They are very hot on these too: the planet and the freedom of the population.
With no access to friends or clubs or societies or groups they will fade away. What motivates them, is for them to think they are a small cog in a big wheel.
For example, they may join the National Trust. Not because of the history (that’s Capricorn’s department) but because their memberships makes them feel they belong to something bigger and if they have a friend who is a member, better still. One lady commented (and she has Moon in Gemini) “I like groups though I like to dip in an out of them.”
They can have lots of friends or one or two but they must have friends so if you want to bond and be friends with an Aquarius you will need to have your ‘interesting-person’ hat on.
Dating an Aquarian Woman
To bond with a female Aquarian lover, one thing is for certain—don’t even think about removing their sense of freedom. A captured Aquarius is a little like a bird in a cage, beautiful to look at, but pining for the freedom they have lost. For instance: “I don’t like the word bonding, it makes me feel a bit shackled and it almost feels forced…”
To date an Aquarius isn’t difficult provided you are interesting or interested they will want to be in your company. Aquarius is a fixed sign and doesn’t like too much change. However to date a female Aquarius you do need to have:
- an opinion
- a viewpoint
The quickest way to turn off an Aquarius is to be suffocating or jealous (unless they have a lot of Cancer or Scorpio in their chart). That just won’t wash.
You will also have to have some means of transport so you can visit places, a few bob to pay for tea and some enthusiasm for what you’re doing.
If you date an Aquarius s/he won’t be worried about how you look, or what you wear, leave that to the Librans and the Leos, s/he will want to know about your thinking process and are they similar to theirs. Do you think along the same lines? Is freedom part of your vocabulary? And are you doing something different or in a different way?
I can’t remember where I read this so please excuse me if this is your idea, it certainly wasn’t mine, that an Aquarius would enjoy a visit to an abattoir because it would be different. This isn’t like Gemini who wants change for changes sake, they want different as in not the same as the masses. Not mainstream. Not the same as everybody else.
If you want to date an Aquarius I suggest that you find about first what their main interests are. Also don’t worry about who you are or what you do for a living. Those things are not important to an Aquarius. What is important is ‘the ideal’ that you will share and it must be something that you can share….the ideal that is, or the idea.
To get an understanding of what an Aquarius needs in a relationship I thought what better place to find the answer to that question than a dating site. The nitty, gritty bits that they find most important when they are looking for a partner.
In the first part of one (long) profile, one Aquarian describes her likes and what she does. She puts her age and physical description and that she likes the theatre, cinema, art and music and “even a bit of dancing”. She says she also enjoys a night in with “good company, nice food and a good bottle of wine, a DVD and/or music and banter.” Now, unless you were an Astrologer like me, you’d skim over those words and think they would apply to most people.
But the beginning of the description includes things this lady does on her own like the walking…she doesn’t actually say she’d like to share those things with anyone and what you have to remember, make note of what people say and also what they don’t say. Later on she mentions the critical items that M.r Right (if he’s out there) will need to pay close attention to if he wants this lady to be happy and vice versa :
I love all animals (especially my cat and two guinea pigs) and am very passionate about animal welfare. This is someone who is passionate about ‘animal welfare’. The Aquarian signature of supporting certain freedoms, in this case the freedom of animals to live happy lives. So, this would be a case of ‘love me, love my pets’. You would have to love this lady’s pets. Can you do that?
Having spent a number of paragraphs describing herself, she then describes her ‘ideal man’:“Ideally, I am looking to meet my ‘soulmate’ to share this journey of life with, someone who is open and honest with themselves and others and who is generous of heart and spirit, caring, kind and considerate (or who is open and aware and working towards these things). I am also looking forward to chatting with like-minded people who share similar interests and beliefs, people who are open and friendly and maybe just want to chat about life and the Universe.”
She has mentioned more than once that she enjoys ‘chatting’, so conversation is important to her and notice how she slips from describing her ideal man….to looking forward to ‘chatting with like-minded people’. Make a big mental note. This lady is not looking for a one-to-one, deep, personal, intense, snuggly, passionate, uplifting, exciting man, so if you’re Scorpio or Cancer or in fact any Water sign STAY AWAY!
She wants to be part of the group, the group that has ‘similar interests and beliefs’ the ideas and cerebral stuff is what she wants. She won’t want you mooning around, heart-broken because you haven’t seen her for a days, worried that because she’s out with her friends again, concerned that she hasn’t returned your calls.
Readers, have you ever dated an Aquarius, or do you have an Aquarian friend? What do you notice about them? Share it in the comment section.
Enjoy book excerpts from the first book in this series, How to Survive a Pisces on Skywriter here:
Mary’s books are available on Amazon.com here: How to Survive a Pisces and How to Bond with An Aquarius. They can also be ordered from the publisher, O Books here: How to Bond with An Aquarius: by Mary English – O-Books Publishing and here: How to Survive a Pisces: by Mary English – O–Books Publishing.
About the author: Mary English was born in London and educated in Switzerland at the American International School of Zurich. She writes an Astrological column for the bi-monthly green parenting magazine ‘The Green Parent’ and appears monthly to ‘Do the Stars’ on the Emma Britton Morning Show on BBC Radio Somerset. Mary sees clients face-to-face and writes personal Birth Charts for visitors to her website. It was these consultations that inspired her to write about the Sun Signs to help her clients understand their motivations and learn about their Astrology profiles. Mary is a member of the Society of Authors and The Astrological Association of Great Britain. Find out more about Mary and her work here: http://www.maryenglish.co.uk or write to her by email here firstname.lastname@example.org.