Posted by: Donna Cunningham | September 13, 2009

High Maintenance–a Venus-Pluto Vignette

(c)2009 by Donna Cunningham, MSW

In a creative writing class, we were assigned to choose a photograph and write a short story based on it. I found this photo so evocative of the qualities of Venus-Pluto aspects and, to a lesser extent, of Venus in Scorpio.  

wmhighmaintenance He wondered, are beautiful girls always this high maintenance?  “All I’m saying is that I’m going to the game with the guys this Saturday night.” 

            “But I’ve been looking forward to seeing you all week. They’ve been so mean to me at work.” Her dark, smoky eyes teared up.

His groin began to stir at the sight of her. It was that wounded look that had grabbed him in the first place. That and the story of how badly she’d been treated by the last man she was with—neglected, verbally abused, cheated on, and finally dumped. The guy had to be nuts to cheat on a sexy gal like her!  “But we’ll be together all day Sunday. I thought I’d take you for a nice brunch—champagne, the works.”

            “So it’s back to me being alone on Saturday nights, just like it was with John.”  She turned her face away from him as her voice caught. “You’re putting me at the bottom of your priority list, the same way he did.”

            He felt a tinge of guilt. “Babe, you know you’re Number One with me. But these are season tickets that the guys and I split. We’ve been doing this for years. Hey, I don’t want you to feel neglected….why don’t you come to a game with us some time?”

            “With a bunch of MEN?  I’d feel completely out of place.”

            “Why don’t you go out with one of your girlfriends?”

            She bit her lip and looked down. “I don’t have any friends any more. I gave them all up for John. There’s no one I’d rather be with than you. Obviously, you don’t feel the same way.”

I can’t believe this! After only six weeks, I’m actually starting to feel trapped. But she’s so drop dead gorgeous, all the guys envy me. “That’s not healthy. We need friends, too, and interests of our own, as well as sharing things. That’s all I’m saying.”

            Her nostrils flared. Her eyes burned. Her voice rose. “I know what you’re saying. I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE SAYING. You want to see other people. Who is it now?”

Oh, shit, she’s escalating! This isn’t the first jealous scene she’s pulled, but each one is worse than the last. “Don’t be ridiculous, Babe You know there’s no one but you.”

            “RIDICULOUS? John said I was being ridiculous, too, when he started missing our Saturday night dates, but I could tell he was seeing someone else. He denied it and kept on sleeping with me right up to the night he finally told me he was engaged.”

            He held her while she sobbed. “I’m not John, and I’m not seeing anyone else.”

            “Prove it then. Give somebody else the ticket. If you really loved me, you’d get rid of that season ticket altogether. Saturday night should be OUR night.”

 Is she right? Is it selfish to want a night with the guys a couple times a month? It’s been a while since I was with somebody. Does being in a relationship mean changing your whole life and giving up all your friends?opil2cvrmini

Suddenly his throat clamped down, and his lungs spasmed. As he gasped for air, he thought, Jesus, it’s an asthma attack! I haven’t had one of these since I left home. This woman is every bit as possessive and controlling as Mom was.

          “You know what? I can’t do this!”

 Note: This has been an excerpt from my ebook Outer Planet Aspects to Venus and Mars (The Outer Planets and Inner Life, v.2), available at Moon Maven Publications.

Another snippet from the book:   Below is a list of celebrities with Venus-Pluto conjunctions. Conjunctions are the strongest aspect of any planetary pair, since there’s virtually no distance between them, and thus it’s harder to get perspective.  You’ll note a number of the celebs in yesterday’s post, The Steamy Side of Venus-Pluto Aspects—A Photo Gallery , in the list below.  The ones with the asterisk have Pluto in Virgo but it is NOT conjunct Uranus, so they show you a pure case of Pluto in that sign:                                                                               

Name:     Field:  Pluto  In Venus In:
Raquel Welch Actress Early Leo Late Cancer
Dr. Phil McGraw Psychologist, TV host Leo Leo
Donna Karan Fashion designer Leo Leo
Jeremy Irons Actor Leo Leo
Antonio Banderas Actor Virgo* Virgo
Sara Ferguson Duchess of York Virgo* Virgo
Sean Penn Actor Virgo* Virgo
Simon Cowell American Idol Virgo* Virgo
Emeril Lagasse Chef Virgo* Virgo
Kobe Bryant Basketball player Libra Libra
Beyonce Knowles Singer Libra Libra

 More Articles about Venus & Relationships on this Blog:

More Posts about Pluto on this Blog: 

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  1. Brrrrrrrrr! Those are the type of behaviors that cause this Libra to do her vanishing act (Moon conjunct Neptune).

    Excellent description of obsessive, controlling behaviors courtesy of Pluto-Venus. Can work the same if Venus aspects Pluto in synastry too, depending on the maturity levels of the individuals. All part of the human experience . . . 🙂

  2. See, I’ve never done that sort of thing and find anyone doing it to me utterly abhorrent. Even with my Venus-Pluto conjoined. Must be my Moon-Uranus (and Ascendant) conjunction that keeps emotional freedom (for me and others) at such a high priority – and makes me run from anything/anyone like this!

    • HI, Leslee, I’m certainly not saying that all Venus-Pluto types are like this–it’s just a story about a certain Venus-Pluto type I’ve encountered many times in my practice. I’d suspect it would be more common among those with Venus and Pluto conjunct in Leo than in Virgo.

      Oh, and the other thing I notice is that many of the people who have a particular Venus aspect do NOT engage in the behavior–in fact, they ahbor it–but instead find themselves somehow repeatedly involved with people who do. This is especially true when the aspect is placed in one of the relationship houses (5th, 7th, 8th) or in this case, with Pluto in those houses. Does that ring a bell? Donna

      • this eerily describes me and an ex to a tee – he was the one with Venus-Pluto but I was the one exhibiting emotionally manipulative behaviours like the woman in the story

  3. Ah, it’s in my first (further in, after the Uranus-Ascendant-Moon in Leo) so not so one of the relationship houses. I’ve encountered people who could be manipulative (my mother could get like that!), but I’ve generally steered clear. I do think the antennae on my Ascendant are probably very attuned to avoiding people like that.

    • Although I do remember when I was young getting involved with a very manipulative Plutonian type. Quite devastating to me, but there were also riches – he introduced me to astrology! Otherwise I suppose I’ve mostly gone in the far direction of being involved with noncommittal types. Hopefully balancing that out now – tPluto is in a long trine of my natal Venus-Pluto. 🙂

  4. LOL. That was me in my 20s/30s to a tee. [Venus late Scorpio in 2nd square Pluto early Virgo in 10th].

    Most men ran. And those who stuck around had their own Pluto/Neptune issues. I have Neptune rising too and both attract and am recovering from addiction.

    Every decade gets better 🙂 And no experience is wasted. Learning to value myself more has significantly changed how I express this energy.

  5. Scary how curate this is of me. Venus conj pluto also with a stellium in scorpio. We dont mean to be controlling but we love too deeply

  6. I have Pluto *libra in 5th** Quintile Venus *cap in 7th**
    What does it mean??? I have definitely sublime all passions into artistic endeavours and idealistic form of love….. any thoughts Donna???

    • It sounds like you’re using the gifts your quintile promises very well–good for beautiful, powerful art. Donna

      • I know someone with that same aspect. Pluto Scorpio Quintile Venus Capricorn. i have pluto conj venus in scorpio and even im not like that. lool too intense

  7. I felt suffocated just reading that! 6 weeks and all that over the top behaviour? Eek!
    I would have dropped the guy if anyone acted that way.

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